For a long time I kept thinking that if only I did this or that…worked harder….got a better education….made more money….was no longer a single parent…..life would be easier.
But it got to a point that I was spinning my wheels and felt exhausted, run down, and drained. In that moment I knew there was nothing else I could do…so I had to turn it all over to God. Allow Him to work in my life. Show obedience in my actions to His Word. It wasn’t just motions I walked through (church, women’s meetings) but a total lifestyle change (thoughts, prayer, music, attitude, circle of influence). And the funny thing about that was that I stopped trying to build myself up in the community because it was taking time from my kids. I turned my focus on my kids and being a better Mother to them…and I felt better….happier. There was a joy there that hadn’t been there before. I didn’t have to work hard to be good enough…I was worth it already I just needed to know that. But I was caught up in the flesh and what people say and the standards of people.
By building my relationship with God….I was able to rebuild who I was…..through His eyes. Saw someone in front of me that had been there for years…just never really saw him until I had a heart for God. And now we are married and building a family…adding to the Kingdom.
It’s not always easy or fun….but it’s worth it because the peace I have is worth the obedience to His Word. If God believes I’m worth it…that is all that matters. #bespiritminded